Wednesday, August 27, 2014

The weight of Mommyhood

I'm having THAT kind of mommy week.  So many obligations - not enough time. Even though I do my best to not overcommit myself it happens anyway.  Great things are happening (new job and promotion, craft business taking off, girls in a new school year) and right, wrong, or  indifferent I am spread thin. 

I had a working lunch with a good friend who just gets my life, and after I showed her a few pictures of a new wreath she asked, "How do you fit it all in?"

Outwardly I brushed it off but inside I was thinking:
  • I disappoint my kids while reading emails during dinner. 
  • I miss improvements in Addi's swimming because I have to take a work call during an important meet, or worse I watch but don't even see it because I'm thinking about a project I have to complete. 
  • I forget things (like tonight, picking up our crop share of veggies) and someone else has to rush and get them. 
  • I focus on the thorns - not the roses - because stopping to smell would take too long. 
  • I break promises to be home because work is more important at the time.   
  • I miss documenting milestones on my blog because I miss the milestones all together. 
  • I feel guilty when school asks for volunteers and there is no way I can do it because it's during working hours. 
  • I have insomnia and don't rest well, then am foggy brained the next day. 
  • I don't remember the last time I hung out with friends and am missing a school mom's night right now to finish a wreath (I'm at the pool, watching Addi, texting about weekend plans and making a bow. Oh, and blogging. 
  • I can't remember the last time I really, truly belly laughed. 
This isn't interesting or even unique to me. But, it sucks. 

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